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EEL PIE DHARMA - a memoir / haibun -  © 1990 Chris Faiers



Chapter 15 - The Clap Clinic

Almost all the hippies in Eel Pie were very sexually active.  Sean even drew up a list of males who 'should be castrated' and posted it.  I was near the top.

Fuckbucket Flo put the rest of us to shame.  She was an older waitress, more of a slattern than a hippie, who discovered she could have all the sex she wanted in the Eel Pie Hotel.

One night she ended up in my room.  She wasn't attractive, with dishwater hair and a rangy figure, but I was horny and she was available.  After we were both naked I could smell a bad odour in her sex.  Our mutual performances were uninspired, just two horny people.

Gypsy Linda was living in my room, and a few nights later I tried to have sex with her.  For an Eel Pie resident she wasn't sexually promiscuous, but as she was attracted to me, she let me rub my cock up and down her thighs and ejaculate on her full bum.  During the rubbing my cock felt itchy, and this added to the sensation.  But when I came, there was a brief, agonizing pain.  I thought his was just from getting off in a more frictional method than usual, and fell asleep.

I awoke early the next morning and made my way downstairs to relieve myself.  I attempted to urinate, and almost passed out.  The searing pain was so strong, I couldn't let the urine go, although my bladder was screaming for release.  I remembered the cliché of pain so great it felt like 'pissing razor blades', and I realized that I had a dose of the clap, gonorrhea.

In a sleepy haze I got dressed, and then found another awake Eel Pier to ask directions to the out patient clap clinic.  The pain was so overriding there was no question of delaying.

After sitting in agony in the waiting room of the public clinic, I was soon ushered into the doctor's office.  He was a nervous man with fastiduous manners, and as he pulled on his rubber gloves, he told me to lower my trousers.

With a weird little smile on his face, he took hold of my cock.  His mannerisms and suppressed giggle made me think he must be a closet homosexual, who enjoyed this legitimate chance to come in contact with young male genitals.  I didn't care what sort of perverse enjoyment he was getting from closely inspecting my cock, I just had to be cured.

He took a swab and inserted it in the opening of my cock.  Again I just about passed out.  After a few questions, he quickly diagnosed gonorrhea, and gave me a shot of penicillin.  I remember the relief being almost immediate.  When I attempted to urinate, it was an incredible relief to be able to pass water again.

The lab analysis also showed I was infected with non-specific urethritis, NSU, an infection as vague as its name.  The penicillin had cleared up the gonorrhea, but I had to take tablets for the NSU for several weeks, and of course refrain from sex.

I had suffered agonies of pain, but even worse I had also unknowingly infected several young girls.

Used condoms
    crumble on a ledge
         fall leaves




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